Years ago, back before my husband was anything more than my attractive nieghbor, he wasn't exactly talented at picking up women. His offer to take me to see new born puppies at a friends home was rather unoriginal, and would lead to many jokes later on. I, of course, accepted the offer. The friend wasn't home when we got there- so we watched the puppies for a little while and left.
It wouldn't be long before I "knew" all of his friends, despite the fact that I'd never met any of them, as they were almost always brought up in conversations between him and I. I quickly understood that I was entering into a tight knit circle of people who cared about each other like family. Soon, I'd find out just how loving these people were.
On one of our first dates, we went downtown to a music festival. All of his friends would end up being there, and I nervous to say the least. One of the first glimpses I caught of this group of late thirty somethings was a small man, with a huge smile hugging and kissing "the wives". My nervousness increased as I realised they were the "touchy feely" sort of people. And I turned and quietly asked if there was anyway I would be able to avoid this display... for the rest of my life. And that kissing man, was Steve- the friend I'd missed meeting when seeing the puppies.
As it turned out, Steve was the official kissing and hugging man. Friendly, and outgoing, always offering advice whether it was wanted or not, and always... always loving.
I managed to avoid the open displays of affection, and dodge away untouched for a while. And they would laugh about it. It must have been so odd to them, this barely 20 something girl, obsessed with the challenge of going untouched by them.
I can recall one conversation, long after his friends had become "our friends" that I would allow each of them one hug, and one sole kiss on the cheek. They could pick the day, either when we got married, or when we had a baby. In my book, these were the only occasions for such behavior. Steve laughed at me, and said one day the hugs would just become as natural as telling a good friend goodbye when they left. Steve hugged and kissed me on both occasions. And I never thought twice about it.
Dinners, big parties, a wedding, and a few babies, lots of holidays- they all seemed to come and go so very quickly. This group of people, who had completely intimidated me- who had grown from little kids into adults with my husband... have grown to be a lot like family to me. I don't mind the hugs and kisses so much, I haven't heard the jokes about where I was in '78 (the year I was born and the year most of them became adults) very often anymore, and I know that when it takes my husband three hours to get gas in his truck- he's most likely just visiting one of them "because it was on the way home".
Steve had been sick for the last few years, and the last time he'd been over, I had had to fill out some checks for him as he didn't have the energy to do it himself. After he left, I'd realised that it had been one of the very few times since I'd gotten married that he hadn't hugged me. And I missed that.
Last night, a small man with a huge smile, and even larger heart passed away. And, I must say, that all those hugs really did seem more natural than saying goodbye to a good friend.
I'm going to be taking a break on writing for a short time, taking care of things that need a little more of my attention right now.
Categories: Misc,
It wouldn't be long before I "knew" all of his friends, despite the fact that I'd never met any of them, as they were almost always brought up in conversations between him and I. I quickly understood that I was entering into a tight knit circle of people who cared about each other like family. Soon, I'd find out just how loving these people were.
On one of our first dates, we went downtown to a music festival. All of his friends would end up being there, and I nervous to say the least. One of the first glimpses I caught of this group of late thirty somethings was a small man, with a huge smile hugging and kissing "the wives". My nervousness increased as I realised they were the "touchy feely" sort of people. And I turned and quietly asked if there was anyway I would be able to avoid this display... for the rest of my life. And that kissing man, was Steve- the friend I'd missed meeting when seeing the puppies.
As it turned out, Steve was the official kissing and hugging man. Friendly, and outgoing, always offering advice whether it was wanted or not, and always... always loving.
I managed to avoid the open displays of affection, and dodge away untouched for a while. And they would laugh about it. It must have been so odd to them, this barely 20 something girl, obsessed with the challenge of going untouched by them.
I can recall one conversation, long after his friends had become "our friends" that I would allow each of them one hug, and one sole kiss on the cheek. They could pick the day, either when we got married, or when we had a baby. In my book, these were the only occasions for such behavior. Steve laughed at me, and said one day the hugs would just become as natural as telling a good friend goodbye when they left. Steve hugged and kissed me on both occasions. And I never thought twice about it.
Dinners, big parties, a wedding, and a few babies, lots of holidays- they all seemed to come and go so very quickly. This group of people, who had completely intimidated me- who had grown from little kids into adults with my husband... have grown to be a lot like family to me. I don't mind the hugs and kisses so much, I haven't heard the jokes about where I was in '78 (the year I was born and the year most of them became adults) very often anymore, and I know that when it takes my husband three hours to get gas in his truck- he's most likely just visiting one of them "because it was on the way home".
Steve had been sick for the last few years, and the last time he'd been over, I had had to fill out some checks for him as he didn't have the energy to do it himself. After he left, I'd realised that it had been one of the very few times since I'd gotten married that he hadn't hugged me. And I missed that.
Last night, a small man with a huge smile, and even larger heart passed away. And, I must say, that all those hugs really did seem more natural than saying goodbye to a good friend.
I'm going to be taking a break on writing for a short time, taking care of things that need a little more of my attention right now.
Categories: Misc,